It fascinates me what I am attracted to doing without coaxing or argument. It is always a physical pursuit - today running stairs in the soft drizzle, running up the hill, slowly and for the longest I have since dislocating my toe a year ago.
Why all these small triumphs now? These obscure and prosaic celebrations of strength, endurance?
T and I walked further and deeper around her neighborhood today, looping down into dead ends, concrete houses, elaborate gardens, elderly couples shuffling past, sharing the view. We discussed pine cone craft projects, my guilt, problem solving structure and ritual. I handed her my finished copy of "Educated." We gave each other pretend hugs.
Back at home D was ready to give me a massage, late afternoon sun and hummingbirds just outside, pink blossoms, manic squirrels. I closed my eyes beneath the blankets and let myself receive love, attention.
422, 915 infected; 18,915 dead; 108,573 recovered. I include this only for record keeping, I do not want to contemplate it today.
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